thisdorkyblogthing said: FMGDW- Tom Hiddleston, but his dick is one of those giant novelty pencils, Sebastian Stan, but his dick is made out of lego, or Chris Hemsworth, who has an entirely normal dick, but he has on a chastity belt of which neither of your has the key to.
omg does tom’s penis say things like ‘greetings from disneyland’
omg seb’s peen is lego
omg this makes it so much harder
okay so I’ll
I’ll get drunk with tom to see what he’d do with his big pencil shlong or be like mr squiggle where he can draw things upside down and I can guess them
I’ll do the diddly with
I’ll marry Hemmyhoot and we can be australian together and pretend our life is normal even with his heavy chasity belt
while I try to do the diddly do with seb or I’ll just sit on his face while trying to never step on his dick or sing everything is awesome to it
HOLY SHIT, I’M IN PAIN. My cackles sound like I’m crying now.
"big pencil shlong"
"and pretend out life is normal even with his heavy chastity belt" I fucking imagined him like in the first Thor instead of tight jeans it’s a chastity belt. I did myself more physical injury with that though, oh jesus!
Let’s how many I actually get. I dunno whether people actually notice my blog.
- 1. had sex?
- 2. bought condoms?
- 3. gotten pregnant?
- 4. failed a class?
- 5. kissed a boy?
- 6. kissed a girl?
- 7. had a job?
- 8. left the house without my wallet?
- 9. bullied someone on the internet?
- 10. sexted?
- 11. had sex in public?
- 12. smoked weed?
- 13. smoked cigarettes?
- 14. smoked a cigar?
- 15. drank alcohol?
- 16. been to a wedding?
- 17. been on the computer for 5 hours straight?
- 18. watched tv for 5 hours straight?
- 19. been late for school?
- 20. kissed in the rain?
- 21. showered with someone else?
- 22. been outside my home country?
- 23. been on a road trip longer than 5 hours?
- 24. had lice?
- 25. gotten my heart broken?
- 26. had a credit card?
- 27. been to a professional sports game?
- 28. broken a bone?
- 29. been unhappy about my weight?
- 30. won a trophy?
- 31. cut myself?
- 32. been on a diet?
- 33. rode in a taxi?
- 34. stayed up for 24 hours or more?
- 35. been to a concert?
- 36. had a crush on someone of the same sex?
- 37. had braces?
- 38. wore make up?
- 39. lost my virginity before I was 16?
- 40. kissed someone a different race than myself?
- 41. Snuck out of the house?
- 42. had oral sex?
- 43. dyed my hair?
- 44. met someone famous?
- 45. been on vacation?
- 46. been on a boat?
- 47. been on an airplane?
- 48. prank called someone?
- 49. taken a pregnancy test?
- 50. been suspended from school?
This song is kicking my arse full force!!